I really enjoy this story since the first time I read it, and it gets even better with every revision. There’s a bigger sense of panic early on which makes more sense, how else would someone react if they realized a piece of their finger was missing? The protagonist drives on and on, completely alone even in the diner and they think that it’s over… but it’s only just begun. Even their memories starts to disappear and I assume they do at the end, it’s a really good Twilight Zone style horror style

I can’t help but feel very frustrated as this author has only written fanfiction for this class even though we’ve told him over and over again that it doesn’t work because he’s assuming that the audience already has knowledge of how the world works in the story. He just added on some more scenes that I guess makes the first chapter feel more complete but this still feels very unfinished. Overall it’s not satisfying to read and there just isn’t much to the story

I don’t like how there doesn’t seem to be any quotation marks for dialogue but I really like the idea how your personality is programmed when you’re a teenager by the universe or something and people are divided into different traits randomly. And it’s not a superficial title either, you are influenced by the zodiac that you’re sorted into. I look forward to reading more about how this world works and I’m wondering if mental illness is a bigger problem in this kind of society than in ours. I don’t like how the story rambles on without any pauses in the story and we only get to hear from the protagonist so I think the story needs more breaks in the plot

I think that there’s a Netflix show or something with a similar title but it’s about a guy aggressively stalking his neighbor because he’s in love with her but he’s crazy about it. I was expecting something similar but it was a normal love story between teenagers one summer at least so far. The pacing feels really rushed so I can’t really enjoy it as much as I could and I’m not really invested in these characters at all. If it had more tension with more scenes involving these characters then I think it would be really fun to read

I like the new parts where Maria’s school day is described, it really takes me back to high school except I didn’t have a rough living condition like her. I still really admire the Coco like aesthetic and the emphasis on family. The ending is kind of concerning though, revealing that Maria got hurt somehow and is hiding it. Maybe a secret abusive boyfriend? I’m not too sure of the cause but I’m looking forward to reading more about these characters.

With a title like this I was kind of expecting something more. The series of events that played out were pretty cool, but because of the short sentence structure it all feels very rushed and there isn’t much emotion behind the words in what is supposed to be an emotional and heart pounding event for someone who’s really invested in the outcome. Plot points aren’t really explained, like the thing with the main character’s mom at the beginning, is she dead or what? I think it has potential but I kind of felt disappointed

At first I thought that she was a neanderthal or some kind of mutation. I still don’t have a confirmation at what the main focus of the story is, but my own guess is that she’s a parasite. After killing a normal girl who wandered into her midst, the creature was able to absorb part of her appearance. I suspect that this creature might have absorbed a monkey or something to get their somewhat simian appearance. Other than that there’s not much else to say, though I’m interested to see what this creature will do next. I wish there was more to read so I could know how this thing came to be or if it will absorb something else.

I thought that could be an alternate title to the story, as that seems to be the protagonist’s opinion. Well I’m not sure I can call them that, they seem more like an antagonist for killing the girl who ruined their relationship and paralyzed their boyfriend. Somehow the main character never got caught and it seems like they will go on to become a serial killer. I wish there was more to the story, and that the author used quotation marks for dialogue scenes, but I did enjoy the story as the antagonist’s rage felt very real to me

Honestly I mentally cringed when I realized that this was Outsiders fanfic but it’s really well written and you don’t really even need to know about the movie/book to get it. I feel like most of the story was just rambling, but I did like the ending. But I don’t feel like these characters would actually stop to think about stuff like that, they’re simple boys from what I know though I haven’t seen the whole movie, thinking philosophically like that seems a bit strange when you know that their upbringing is crap and they haven’t really had a good education at all. It’s not a bad thing for their character, it just threw me off

It seems to be a story about a little girl thrown in the trash and rescued by a drug addict who just uses her as a servant and to keep herself from overdosing. Kiko’s adoptive mother is a hot mess who talks badly about the little girl behind her back. But when she overdosed, Kiko was forced to live with her previous adoptive mother’s friend who turned out to be an angry, abusive asshole. Basically nothing seems to go right for her.

But it was because Kiko didn’t understand she was in danger of overdosing she accidentally caused her death, which may be part of Andy’s anger towards her justified in a way since she accidentally let his sister overdose, but doesn’t justify forcing a small child to live in a closet.

One night Kiko had a nightmare about her mother’s corpse and climbed into bed with her uncle and he tried to rape her. That night she knocked him out and got away but living with him was hell. Kiko was still a servant and it’s implied he might have sexually abused her. Andy was a drunk a lot of the time, but he was easier to deal with that way. Kiko also had to take a job at a young age

I’m glad that Kiko got to go to school, but she felt jealous of a popular girl named Jessica for having an easy life and impersonated her during a high school party. She is coerced to drink and passes out, but is luckily taken home by an attractive boy who wanted to see her again

Just when it seems like Kiko is out of danger, her uncle is furious and calls her a tramp, then accuses her of sleeping with the boy who brought her home. Then he beats Kiko in a fit of rage and blames her for it, and leaves her out in the woods believing her to be dead. But Kiko wasn’t dead, and she is horrified to find herself buried alive. Then the story ends.

It’s just awful for poor Kiko the entire time, I’m hoping that her uncle thinking she’s dead can help her escape and find a better life somewhere else, or maybe the boy can help? I don’t know but I liked the story and I’m hoping that this poor girl finally gets a break for once in her life